a plea

Some thoughts on writing, courtesy of a publishing intern, directed at THOSE authors (you know who you are):

Please, please, please for the sake of my sanity, edit your manuscripts.
And I don't strictly mean clean up your grammar mistakes (but seriously... their, there, they're. This isn't rocket science.)
Edit them for CONTENT.

Do I want to read a five page description of what each character is wearing when they meet up for dinner? Well--is it relevant to the story? Chances are the answer to that question is no. Which means that you need to cut it out. I don't care how attached you are to those pages of boring, shabby prose. Ask yourself: is this relevant? No? Then leave it out.

And can we talk about character development? How about we try keeping characters consistent? "Joe" is a brilliant private eye. He is thorough, smart, stealthy. He doesn't take crap from anybody. Cool, okay. I'm on board. He sounds awesome. But when you send him strolling willy-nilly into an investigation of some creepy manor only to set off every alarm in the house (which he is BREAKING IN TO, by the way. Because he doesn't worry about the legal ramifications of his actions... like losing his license or going to jail), to be chased by the guard dogs he totally managed to miss on the way in, and to make a million other amateur mistakes... well, that's not consistent with Joe's character, now is it? You, as an author, do not get to create characters and then yank them around without consequence. When you do this, when you abandon any kind of fidelity to the character that you have created, I don't buy it. It's insulting that you expect your audience to accept your half-baked plot developments. Give your readers some credit. I, and any other poor soul that reads your manuscript, am not going to appreciate inconsistencies like these.

This also goes for all of you authors that think you can wave a magic wand and erase the previous emotions or conflicts of your characters. "Jenny" is totally in love with "Johnny." Too bad "Johnny" is totally mad at Jenny. He swears he will never forgive her. She's murdered his dog or something. Next thing you know--these two are blissfully in love. So what changed? What happened? Well, "Jenny" batted her eyelashes, they exchanged a couple of awkward lines of dialogue and bing, bang, boom... "Johnny" is like,"Oh man, forget that she set my house on fire. I suddenly love her. I yearn for her. If she ever leaves me I will forgo all food, air, and participation in life until she returns to my side. Maybe I'll ride motorcycles at high speeds and jump off cliffs until she comes back."
 (Wait, sorry, somehow that started to be a Twilight rant. Ahem.)

My point is, if you set up characters and situations only to completely undermine them in your next breath, your audience will lose all trust in you as an author. Your audience will be turned off by your story. I, the intern, will want to dump your manuscript in the recycling bin. But because I am an intern, I'll trudge on and read it (because I have to). But I will resent you. I will resent you and your "book." Or rather manuscript. Because if I have any say it will never become a book.

Moral of this story:
EDIT. EDIT EDIT EDITEDITEDITEDITEDIT. UGHHH